To improve the dispersion of graphene oxide particles in wood for better thermal conductivity, this paper proposes the feasibility of obtaining graphene oxide with a smaller particle size using ball milling and its application in melamine resin-modified poplar veneer. The median diameter of multilayer graphene oxide was measured to learn the effects of different ball milling conditions on the particle size of graphene oxide, and the optimum ball milling process was chosen. In addition, the microscopic characterization of graphene oxide under the optimum ball milling process was carried out to investigate the microstructural changes in multilayer graphene after ball milling. Furthermore, the thermal conductivity of the graphene oxide/melamine resin-impregnated mixture modified veneer with the optimum ball milling process was also tested. The results show that, under the optimum ball milling process conditions of SDS wet ball milling with a vibration frequency of 30 Hz for 60 min, the particle size of the multilayer graphene was the smallest, and the median diameter could be reduced to 124 nm. Simultaneously, the thermal conductivity of the melamine resin-modified poplar veneer enhanced by the ball-milled graphene reached 0.405 W·m⁻¹·K⁻¹. In addition, it revealed that the number of graphene oxide layers was reduced to four after ball milling. However, the multilayer graphene was partially oxidized, the lamellar structure was destroyed and the crystallinity was reduced.