Purpose: Having paid work, relationships and a choice of where to live are common policy priorities for adults with intellectual disabilities. The purpose of this paper is to compare outcomes with respect to these three priorities between adults with intellectual disability and the general population in Jersey. Design/methodology/approach: Data were collected from 217 adults with intellectual disability known to services, and 2,350 adults without intellectual disability using a stratified random sample. Data on employment, marital status and accommodation profiles were compared. Findings: In sum, 87 per cent of adults with intellectual disability were currently single vs 16 per cent of adults without intellectual disability; 23 per cent of working-age adults with intellectual disability were in paid employment vs 92 per cent of working-age adults without intellectual disability; and 57 per cent of adults with intellectual disability lived-in sheltered housing vs 2 per cent of adults without intellectual disability. Social implications: Very few adults with intellectual disability are in paid employment or intimate relationships, and the majority live in sheltered, supported housing, with very few owning their own home. There is a significant disconnect between policy and reality. Considerable work is required to make an ordinary life the reality for adults with intellectual disability. Originality/value: This study adds to the body of evidence that suggests people with intellectual disabilities are less likely to experience an ordinary life. Furthermore, it illustrates that despite Jersey being an affluent society, the same difficulties and barriers exist there for persons with an intellectual disability as in other jurisdictions.